Until I had children, I never noticed this phenomenon.
Sometimes, when I look at their facial expressions, gestures, or body movements, I “see” other relatives, ancestors, in them. Usually, this is simply a brief moment or a few seconds at the most, when all of the sudden, I am not looking at my child, but Elmer Buck, my mothers father, or someone else living or dead that came before them. I don’t conciously try to do this, it just happens.
And just as striking as these resemblances appear, they slowly fall apart. I always compare it to cloud formations. At first you see a definite form and then the wind blows, distorting, streching, changing forever the image you originally imagined.
Last night, while Avery was sleeping, he became Mike for a second or two. He looked peaceful and confident all at the same time.
It was beautiful and amazing.
Hi Chris,
You forgot to mention “cheerfully naughty”, a look I often see on Avery’s face and imagine was Mike’s standard expression too. It is amazing how the relaxed faces of sleeping people, and particularly children, can show us such a different side to them, but maybe peaceful and confident at the same time is a relaxed version of cheerfully naughty.
I have recently experienced that instant and earth-shifting feeling of recognizing a face on someone else related to me, thought it has been a much more solidifying experience for me.
My mother died when I was very young and so I did not grow up knowing her famliy at all, but as an adult I have come to know one of my aunts. I met her son Jacob when he and my eldest daughter were babies and did not see him again until he was 10 years old. Oh my god! When I saw his face, I saw my 10 year old self looking back at me! I grew up looking and feeling really different from my family (and still do, even my children all look like Dave) but when I saw Jacob I finally felt like I was KIN to someone and it helped. It was a balm, and I say let’s be grateful for whatever balms we can find in this life. I hope seeing Mike in your son’s face and being reminded of their kindred natures can help balm your heart and soul, maybe even give you a bit of peace and confidence of your own. Sounds like it already has for today.
love,
Samantha